The Big Picture
Lately, I've been reading the book of Genesis. It is funny how you know all of the stories as a kid, but when you read them again as an adult, they can take on a completely different meaning. I just finished reading the story of Joseph. This guy was estranged from his family for most of his life because his brothers sold him, yet he was able to completely forgive them for everything they had done, because he saw the big picture. The fact was, after he was sold, Joseph went on to become a powerful leader, an opportunity he wouldn't have had if he hadn't been sold. Not only was he successful, he was also instrumental in saving the lives of his entire family because of his powerful position. And it wouldn't have happened if he hadn't been sold.
Can you even imagine that? It is sometimes hard to think of my birth mom in a forgiving way. After all, she gave me away - its not a good feeling. But when I think of the level of Joseph's forgiveness, it is inspiring. He remembered his brothers selling him. He knew it was because they were jealous. He had years and years to be angry about it, and he had every right to be angry. When his brothers came to him for help, he could have easily told them to go home and die. But it says that he wept at the sight of them and forgave them and it is because he was able to look past everything that is so wrong about what happened to him and see that it was God's way of saving his family from death.
It is a lot easier to be forgiving when you think of things that way. God had a plan for me, and it wasn't to stay with my mother, just like it wasn't God's plan for Joseph to stay with his family. By being adopted, I've been exposed to people and situations that I wouldn't have otherwise been exposed to, just like Joseph was presented with opportunities he wouldn't have had if he hadn't been sold. It is a LOT easier to forgive someone when you take a step back and look at the big picture and realize that even something that seems so inherently wrong, like selling your brother or leaving your baby, can be turned into a blessing.
Can you even imagine that? It is sometimes hard to think of my birth mom in a forgiving way. After all, she gave me away - its not a good feeling. But when I think of the level of Joseph's forgiveness, it is inspiring. He remembered his brothers selling him. He knew it was because they were jealous. He had years and years to be angry about it, and he had every right to be angry. When his brothers came to him for help, he could have easily told them to go home and die. But it says that he wept at the sight of them and forgave them and it is because he was able to look past everything that is so wrong about what happened to him and see that it was God's way of saving his family from death.
It is a lot easier to be forgiving when you think of things that way. God had a plan for me, and it wasn't to stay with my mother, just like it wasn't God's plan for Joseph to stay with his family. By being adopted, I've been exposed to people and situations that I wouldn't have otherwise been exposed to, just like Joseph was presented with opportunities he wouldn't have had if he hadn't been sold. It is a LOT easier to forgive someone when you take a step back and look at the big picture and realize that even something that seems so inherently wrong, like selling your brother or leaving your baby, can be turned into a blessing.
posted by everyscarisabridge at 7:31 PM
4 Comments:
You know, that's a very good point.
Ah...but God's perspective on the world is infinitely more far-reaching than ours ever could be. We can only see each moment as it is occurring and the events of our past (as we can best interpret them) in our teeny, tiny little worlds. God sees everything - past, present, and future - outside of time. We progress along a timeline. God does not. We see the coercion, pressure, and lack of support from the mother's family and the father not being able to or refusing to help. We see what may be a horrible experience for the mother. The mother, in fact, may truly have a horrible experience. But, perhaps, God sees something altogether different. Perhaps God sees the person whose life will be impacted by the adopted child...many, many years down the road...maybe even many years on down the road from where we currently are right now. Maybe this is someone whom this person would only have met through these particular circumstances, and while the events may never be connected in her mind, God is busy fitting the pieces of the puzzle together...and having no difficulty doing so because He knows exactly what the picture is supposed to look like and where all the pieces are supposed to go. Maybe the "horrible experience" of the birth mother is one meant to teach her or help her grow in some form or fashion. She would never understand this at the time, and maybe she would never come to a full and conscious understanding of this, but is it beyond God to have things happen in such a way? It is often the difficult and painful times that we go through that end up turning into the catalysts for unexpected growth as a person and understanding of ourselves and the world in which we live...and, consequently, what our place is in the world and how we are to find some kind of real meaning in understanding why things are the way they are.
"All things work together for good for those that love the Lord." That's not to say everything will seem good to us or even BE good to us. But God is working out a greater good from all of our circumstances, the "good" ones and the "bad" ones. He's not setting everything up so that He can watch us fall and laugh at us. Everything works according to His plan so that we might truly experience the good He has in store for us...a final good that might be hard or impossible to see as a result of the obstacles that are currently in our way and waiting to be overcome.
I definitely agree that lack of support from family and community is a big reason that people decide to give their children up for adoption.
Why would God allow such a horrible thing to happen? I can't say that I know the answer to that, but what I do know is that He can take something horrible and make it into something positive, because He has done it in my life. It isn't always easy to see the positive effects of certain things in our lives.
For example, when I was 16, I started getting sick - I was tired all the time and my hands and feet were constantly hurting. I had played the piano since I was 7 and was planning on going to college to be a music major - I wanted to be a classical pianist. Once I started getting sick, I couldn't practice anymore. I was really, really angry. Since I was adopted, I didn't have any family history and it took them over a year to diagnose me with rheumatoid and psoriatic arthritis. It took almost another two years to find the right combination of pills to make me able to do things like make a fist or walk for more than a few feet without it hurting.
At the time that all of this was going on, I had no idea why it was happening. It was horribly depressing. But now, when I look back I can see that, given my stubborn nature, getting sick was probably the only thing that would have stopped me from pursuing a career as a musician and I am SOOOO glad now that I didn't go that route. Instead I got a business degree, and as a result met my husband and some of my best friends through college and my job. I've introduced a coworker and a childhood friend of mine to each other and they are getting married this summer! Who knows where I'd be right now if I hadn't gotten sick and for that matter if I hadn't been adopted. Maybe I'd be a world-famous pianist, but I wouldn't know the people that I know, and to me that is a lot more horrible than being sick.
Obviously I can only speak for myself here, but I really do believe that God has a plan for everything that happens in my life.
Of course! =) I guess it is all just a difference in outlook. Either way, I think we would all agree that whether it's God or human choice or a combination of both, it is possible for positive things to come from things that seem negative at the time.
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